Dealing With Family, Friends, and Money

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This is really good advice. What a great experience. This is the time for people to be seeking advice and developing their own plan for starting or adding to personal savings. The advice here is good and direct. This is a good resource for those looking.

The bottom line is that we - as Americans - have to learn to pay ourselves first. Be honest about expectations and communicate with our partner, husband or wife.

Thank you.

Loyd Ford

www.STICKYASSET.com/blog

Loyd Ford of NC 11:33AM January 14, 2009

I was chatting online with an old acquaintance about politics. He asked me very innocently if I worked nearby, perhaps we could continue our conversation over lunch or coffee. Today we had that lunch. It was a casual place where you pay at the register.. I ordered first and feebly pulled out my wallet. But I kind of just stood there fumbling, not really sure what I was supposed to do. So awkward. Like most guys would, he said, "I've got it" and handed over a $20 bill. But even those 30 seconds of not knowing were really uncomfortable. Not to mention giving him the, "are you sure? okay, well thank you, John!" big-smile line felt sooo fake. What's the right thing to do?

Diana Gilbert of CA 9:41PM October 03, 2008

Here are the answers to your questions:

http://www.usnews.com/blogs/alpha-consumer/2008/2/20/readers-awkward-money-questions.html

Kimberly Palmer of 2:04PM February 20, 2008

What's the rule about who pays while your dating? I'm still a graduate student, so my disposable income is almost non-existent. However my significant other has a steady job and a reliable source of income. I feel guilty that he always pays, even when I do have some cash available. I offer to pay but he more often than not refuses the very notion.

Veronica of NH 6:52PM February 10, 2008

That's a great question John, thank you. I've gotten some other questions emailed to me, so if anyone has any more, please send them to me or post them by Monday, and then we'll get some answers for you -- thanks!

Kimberly Palmer of 10:16AM February 08, 2008

After a couple of good years during which I bought a very expensive house and new car, I had some tough financial times and am still struggling. Recently an old college friend phoned me to ask if I would consider a substantial contribution to our alma mater - he suggested $5,000, and I answered that that was way beyond my means. It was a difficult conversation for me, and we haven't spoken since.

I am afraid that he didn't believe me, and thinks that my $50 gifts mock a cause that's important to him.

Is there anything I can do to straighten things out so that he understands that I am supporting his cause in line with my reduced income?

John of CA 2:57PM February 07, 2008

Thanks for the extra tips! Although, I'll be the first to admit that giving up some of those things (especially coffee) is not as easy as it sounds.

Now, how about some awkward money questions for Jeanne Fleming and Leonard Schwarz??

Kimberly Palmer of 10:11AM February 06, 2008

hi Kim, just remember, " no good deed goes unpunished", when you lend money to family, never expect it back, because chances are the balance of power, as far as money goes, is the way it is for a reason. Also, don't be so shy about speaking up. If you don't have the money for Chez Je Suis Fauche, then don't go, or say so.

bruce of NJ 5:32PM February 05, 2008

Hi Kimberly,

I read your article on Savings tips. Here I am adding more.

= Can't they do their own house cleaning? Do you really need Maid Service to clean your mess?

= How hard is to Iron your dress once a week? Do you really need an outsider to do your ironing?

= Do you really need to use Cell phone at home! Did they forgot Landline still in service?

= How hard is to spend beautiful day outside moving your lawn, mulching, fertilizing or watering?

= Does the dog get botherd if you don't walk with you? Does it really need another person to walk your dog?

= Starbucks? Rip off!

= Can they stop signing for Gym and not using it?

= How many new dresses you really need? - You want durable dress. But you wear only once! Go Figure!

vas of OH 2:43PM February 05, 2008

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Alpha Consumer

Kimberly Palmer, senior editor for U.S. News & World Report, writes about making smarter financial decisions. She’s the author of Generation Earn: The Young Professional's Guide to Spending, Investing, and Giving Back.

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