5 Ways to Save at Weddings

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I don't agree with the point to stick to one celebration. As a bride, I'm spending money and time to plan events. My bridesmaids are also spending their money and time to plan the bachelorette party, wedding shower, etc. If I'm inviting you, it means I want you there and am willing to spend whatever necessary to have you there. While I understand that some people may not be able to attend all wedding-related events, keep in mind that the hosts of these events have taken the time to prepare these and want you there. They wouldn't have invited you otherwise, right?
Attending a wedding shower is not going to break the bank (unless you live far away, of course). If you can't afford to spend money on a ridiculous gift (which is not needed, anyway), just bring a congrats card with some kind words. Your presence there means so much more than a gift. Most brides and grooms are excited about celebrating with you, not about what gift you brought them.

Ann of TX 11:32AM August 22, 2008

Kimberly and everyone- Oops, what I meant was, if yours was a name crossed off a long list because one or both of the betrothed didn't see your friendship last a decade, then you are free to discharge them as friends too. As I read the bullet point again I realize it applies to invitees too.

Lx of VA 4:07PM August 01, 2008

"Ask yourself, will I still be friends with this person in 10 years? If the answer is no, then consider responding with a polite decline."
Necessary and inevitable. And if you're on the other side of this empire belt tightening then be consistent, keep your dignity, and politely decline the friendship with either member of this new duo. Silence does it.

Lx of VA 4:03PM August 01, 2008

Save money altogether and not have a wedding. Just have a nice party after you leave the courthouse. Ask close family members to help out with the food cost. Some foods you can prepare yourself, others can be ordered at a discount for big crowds

tess of GA 7:42PM July 24, 2008

My friend is the first in our group of friend to get married. Looking back I spent way tooooooo much on the shower gift, and I probably didn't need to pay the extra fees for Amazon to wrap the wedding gift for me. Still no word yet on a bachelorette party, but the maid of honor implied Atlantic City and the CT casinos were probably out of the question as they were drastically over-priced.

Veronica of NY 5:16PM July 23, 2008

As a recent bride, I agree with almost everything mentiond above. I worked very hard to keep costs minimal for the bridesmaids (black cocktail dresses off the rack - not one of them needed tayloring) and tried to encourage everyone to keep their spending to a minimum. Additionally, I was SHOCKED at some of the gifts we received from friends our own age - I would've never expected half of that in a million years, nor was it necessary. The bottom line is that the bride and the groom only want you there if you want to be there - they are putting some significant money into each guest that shows up. There were a handful of people who didn't make it, and that was more than OK. The only small issue I have with the comments above is in regards to splitting the costs with friends. I agree - bunk up with your college friends, but I wouldn't put that on the bride and groom's "to do list." They have a million things on that list, and doing anything more than making a roomie recommendation might be a little over the top :) Other than that, I'd like to emphasize that weddings are meant to be fun!

Amy of GA 3:27PM July 23, 2008

That's a great point, thanks Veronica. On that note, it also pays to book the room far enough in advance that you get any discount the wedding party has pre-arranged. (Those discounted rooms can go quickly though, so that's why it's important to book in advance.)

Kimberly Palmer of 6:10PM July 21, 2008

I have perfectly good dresses that I never wear anywhere and I've decided that instead of getting a new dress for my friend's wedding, I'm wearing one I have.
I do have one recommendation about splitting the hotel room. Book the refundable rate in the event your friends or other guests flake out on you. I have a wedding in "upstate" New York (AKA not NYC or Westchester) and invited my old college roommates to split the room with me. At first they were all on board, then invariably life got in the way and they bailed....

Veronica of NY 5:30PM July 21, 2008