What to Do About a Bad Reference

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I was working for 2 Oral Surgeons for a little over 4 years. One of the surgeons had no problems with me , no issues, we got along beautifully. The other one however, was cruel, degraded me, tried every way possible to make me quit my job. I truly enjoyed the work I was doing which was assisting in surgery. The one who didn't like me really gave me hard times during surgery; could never do anything right. He is the one who interviewed me and hired me!! I've got over 20 years experience in the dental field, so I knew my job duties and did them well. I did everything possible to get along with this one doctor, but he was impossible. In fact, at one point, he stripped me of all my duties assisting, he had me scrubbing instruments all day! He had eventually turned the entire staff against me and the other surgeon was fighting to keep me there. Well, the last year of employment, the tyrant started having problems with drugs and I am no fool when it comes to drug abuse. The other assistants were quite young, high schoolish, and very naive. Because I caught on to his habit, and I guess new too much, he fired me. I am the type of employee who stays late to finish up everything, I give a full 8 hours of work with no slacking off, and go above and beyond my call of duties like working on weekends if the doctor had an emergency call in, I offered my assistance to go and help. I consider myself to be a work-aholic. I have been out of work since January 2011 and still cannot find a job! Two interviews I went on, I knew the doctors well and they knew my former employers well also. I was informed that the tyrant was spreading really ugly things about me, just speaking very badly about me. The only reason these doctors told me was because they know how this tyrant is and he is not well liked by most of the surgeons in the area and they also know that what is being said is not true. But, what about the ones whom I don't know and who don't know him?? One of the assistants I worked with told me that he was going to make certain that I could not get a job around the area and it looks like he is succeeding!! I had to put up with his sexual comments, harassing me to have drinks with him after work and vulgar text messages. When he realized I wasn't going to play his sick games, that is when he totally changed his behavior with me. How unfair is this??!!! I saw an attorney for advice about the sexual harassment, but said that it would be very difficult, drawn-out case and I would have to have really hard-core evidence so, suggested that I just move on and leave him alone!! Well, I have no income at all, about to be evicted from my house, about to have my vehicle repossessed and have had to fill out job apps at Burger King!! With all my years in this field, I am applying at B.K.?? What is wrong with this picture?? So, tell me if his bad reference or speaking ugly about me is not hurting my chances for getting a job?? About to lose it!!!

Monessa(Meko) Douet of LA 1:24PM August 10, 2011

I was diagnosed with Parkinsons disease aprox 6 years ago. I am 50 years old. As my Parkinsons progressed I started to feel that I was being targeted from management, especially within the past 6 months of employment. My performance was spotless and numerouse accomodations for excelent sales and and awards for customer service . After 20 years of service with this company? When management starts to target you, they will find the smallest reasons to create a paper trail on you so they can have reason to terminate you. I started to feel like they were looking at me as a accedent waiting to happen. due to my tremors with parkinsons. Now they have denied my benefits and not eligible for rehire. And after several interviews, which went very well, until they call my previous employer, then the job process stops there. I filed disability. I am forced to take legal action for discrimination and wrongfull termination. This kind of Persecution has to stop ! !

damon of TX 11:18AM August 05, 2011

what about :

4. Checking that an old boss is indeed giving inaccurate information because he/she is now in a position of being a direct competitor of yours and is simply an unscrupulous coward who will do anything to squash competition. In that case, I would certainly opt for a lawsuit. IN FACT, why not suggest that if someone is giving inaccurate information about you... period. Isn't that considered calumny? A crime? I'm surprised you didn't mention that as an option. I understand going straight to HR but why not just go straight to the lawsuit!? I mean, if the harm has already been done once, isn't that enough?

Dave 2:11AM August 03, 2011

The same thing happened to me at a job I had for almost 10 years. I was fortunate enough, if you want to call it that, to have had the new boss scream out in a place of business that I had been "stealing them blind". I immediately went to an attorney and filed a lawsuit. This was a non-profit company, and the new boss had immediately put in place an insurance plan to cover lawsuits. Hmmmm, wonder why. My work record and ethics were impeccable. I won the lawsuit, but I really wanted a public apology. She also said this in front of the local judge's wife. A very good witness. It never went to court as they settled out of court. I strongly suggest you at least talk to an attorney. Most of them has free consultation and will give you an idea if there is any hope for winning.

Carol Klindt of MO 5:33PM July 15, 2011

I worked for a place for 4.5 years and had "outstanding" ratings on my evaluations. My position was terminated going in to the new fiscal year. I was led to believe my termination was due to budget issues, but the day after my last day the company put out a press release crowing about how they did not lay off any workers and other verbiage that gave the impression that anyone not with the company anymore was let go for a reason. I wrote an email to the president of the company and asked what the reason was for my case. No answer.

I have tried to move on with my life, but just recently after my 3rd interview with a new company for an almost identical job, the process has come to a screeching halt after the reference check. I met with a lawyer right after my job loss and decided not to pursue legal action at that time, but now that I am positive they are providing a lousy reference, it is time to break out the big guns. It is cowardly and snively of this company to apparently have a "reason" for my termination that was not disclosed to me and in fact I was told "you are not terminated, the position is terminated" whatever that is supposed to mean. I've never been fired or laid off before and it is a shock. Fine. Shock over now... but they don't have the right to impede me from ever making a living again. I think it will take a court action to get whatever it is they are saying out in the open.

anon of GA 11:33AM July 13, 2011

I have a question. This is a Canadian example, but perhaps you can provide some help.

In February, I was laid off from my job. The official reason for the layoff, a corporate restructuring and my position was eliminated.

During my time with my organization, I never received any disciplinary reports or progressive improvement plans. The only thing I did receive was a performance appraisal plan, which was good, but did highlight some areas of improvement, none of them very serious.

Recently, I have gone through a several interviews where I have come to the reference stage. Each of these potential employers were very positive about me, but after the reference checks they completely cooled off.

This last position that I applied to was with a former boss who informed me after the reference stage that I had received a "flat reference" from my last boss.

What she said this meant was that my ex-boss did not say anything overtly negative, but that her tone and attitude towards me implied I was not a good hire.

However, given that this is the second job which I have lost after the reference check, I wonder if there was perhaps something much more negative that was said which my former boss cannot tell me.

Unfortunately, she says she is also unable to tell me anything specific as she is bound by rules of confidentiality and privacy. However, given that I was considered the preferred candidate for this position prior to the reference check, I find it hard to believe that a flat reference could have the impact that it did, especially given that she also told me that my other two references were very good.

The problem here, however, is that I cannot ask this former boss for more information because her organization actually works with my old organization, where my ex-boss is. Therefore, it is a major conflict on interest on her behalf, and I have no wish to cause her to lose her job.

Additionally, because my career is in PR, I am concerned that launching a lawsuit against my former organization could potentially kill my career before it starts. Finally, if I just remove my ex-boss as a reference, how do I address the potential question of why she is not listed as a reference? Given I didnt seem to have any issues with her prior to leaving my job, can I just say that her and I had a falling out? Would that work? Any advice?

Joe of CA 8:37PM July 05, 2011

I worked for a small shoe store for 8 years, training, managing, ordering, pretty much running the store. My pay was 8.50 hour, the owner hired a couple of people(I trained them) and hired them on at 8.00 hour. I was not to happy about thisso I started looking for another job after talking with the boss and he was not going to make it right. I got a job, the working conditions were to say the least awful. I got sick and got laid off. I'm now trying to get another job and my boss from the shoe store is giving me very bad reference checks, saying well she pretty much goes by her own schedule, and the big one, there was a question of theft. Which is not true! I did go by my schedule because i made the schedule along with the other girls. The theft thing is killing me. I am going to lose everything I have worked so hard for if I dont stop his lie. Any suggestions since Colorado is an at will state and the labor board says that employers can pretty much say what they want.

Melissa of CO 9:34AM June 27, 2011

Asil, I feel for you and I couldn't believe after I read about your situtation, exactly samething happend to me. The problems are employer. They like people who are busy plenning, playing mind games and kissing the butt.

emily of MD 11:15AM June 10, 2011

Asil of GA: Maybe things went 'ugly' because you have no idea how to form a proper sentence, let alone spell.

Charlie of AR 12:57PM April 26, 2011

I worked @ my dream job for 5.5yrs and for 4 of them, my "boss" didn't even know how to do her job much less be a boss. It was a small company <10ppl and I was not chosen not because of education, skills, or experience, but because of seniority. The girl chosen barely made it out of high school yet she was chosen to run a financial institution. After 2.5 yrs of making all of the business decisions, I then allowed her to sink or swim. I was killing myself under stress and she was shopping for 3 hr's with her childhood bff that she hired in a equal but vulnerable position as I was. When bff wasn't producing and boss girl kept nagging about the $$ we were losing I layed it all out for her and she went to the board and blamed me. Ugly situation. I did everything there to accommodate her lackadaisical work ethnic and was faithful until the end in covering her tracks. I then lost it with the BOD chair and he told me to pack my stuff and "get the hell out"! Hows that for professional. He asked me if there was anything he could do to help me, health-wise and I had a very well documented talk with him. So now, after that fiasco, I'm unable to use them as references. All because of butt kissing politics. So how do you get around that. I never had a written evaluation only raises. And nothing at all in my employment file.

Asil of GA 2:54AM March 26, 2011

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