Death-Defying Websites Pass Crucial Info to the Grieving

Services help the departed relay account numbers, passwords, and documents

September 17, 2009 RSS Feed Print
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Many of us have readied for our physical death by doing such things as getting life insurance and wills in place. Now a number of websites want to prod us into prepping our virtual selves for the afterlife. They're offering digital safekeeping for documents, online passwords, and other data that could prove crucial or comforting to grieving relatives and friends.

Some techies understand the death-defying power of the Internet. For years, programmers have coded computers to send E-mails if the user didn't enter a password in a timely fashion—say, every week. The notes originally went to supervisors or colleagues with needed passwords and instructions. They later included E-mails to friends and loved ones and were called "death switches," writes David Eagleman, who turned the concept into Deathswitch.com.

[See 6 Secrets to Saving Your Laptop and Data.]

Several sites arose from the personal experiences of entrepreneurs who tried to unwind the Web affairs of loved ones after they died. Jeremy Toeman conceived LegacyLocker.com after struggling unsuccessfully to get access to his grandmother's Hotmail account after she died. "I wanted to contact her friends to let them know of her passing," he says. In pondering his own mortality during a plane flight, he realized nobody would know the passwords to Web domains he owns.

For Joe Palmer, WeRemember.org arose partly from painful memories of his mom in repeated court fights with her family after her father died and his latest will couldn't be found. "Needless to say, we haven't spoken to that side of the family in over 20 years," he says. Most of us don't want to think about death, he adds, but consequences for survivors can be long-lasting.

Palmer says dealing with death is a natural evolution for consumers who increasingly move their lives online, to online banking, social networking, and photo sharing. "People understand that the Internet is getting safer over time, and they're willing to trust it with more."

Some security experts, however, think that it's risky to submit all one's valuable data to an online site, even though the sites use passwords and encryption to protect data.

[Read about services that make it easy to share photos and videos on the Web.]

Here is what sites offer to ease the ultimate digital transition:

LegacyLocker.com: The site goes beyond a typical list of accounts and passwords and actively manages them by periodically accessing accounts. It alerts users when it fails and prompts them to update the username and password on file. The site also uses a notably human touch after being notified of a death, with live staff members confirming it with two people designated by the account holder. The service also requires a copy of a death certificate. Then a "beneficiary" designated by the account holder will get the keys to the online assets. Users can write an accompanying letter or upload a video. They can also upload encrypted copies of documents, such as wills. Users can try a free version that covers three digital accounts that can be passed on to the one beneficiary. Or they can pay $30 a year or $300 a lifetime for unlimited assets and beneficiaries.

WeRemember.org: Focusing on the documents that are crucial to sorting out an estate, WeRemember notes that billions of dollars in life insurance benefits go unpaid simply because no survivors know the policies existed. Other estates go into costly probate because wills can't be found. Users fill out a simple profile with the names of insurers, investments, and beneficiaries. Account holders also note if they have a will and where it can be found. The site routinely monitors public and government databases for death notices before notifying beneficiaries. The notifications for now are by phone. The service is free, although there is a premium account that, for a fee of $30, provides a packet of claims forms and other help for beneficiaries. The site aims to earn most of its money from relationships with insurers, attorneys, and other sites that offer coverage, planning, and other services at WeRemember.

Deathswitch.com: This site sends periodic messages to account holders. If they don't respond, it assumes they've died (or gone into a coma) and sends an E-mail to a beneficiary. Users can put account numbers, passwords, document locations, love notes, or "unspeakable secrets" into the E-mail. A free account allows one note to one beneficiary. For $20 a year, Deathswitch will send as many as 30 E-mails to as many as 10 recipients each. Notes from the premium account can include attachments, such as copies of documents, photos, or videos. Users can set how frequently they want Deathswitch to confirm they're alive and how long the service should wait before contacting beneficiaries.

SlightlyMorbid.com: A trusted friend or loved one is the key to this service, which depends on a third party to notify it when an account holder has died. At its most basic level, the service will send an E-mail to 10 friends and can be notified by one "trusted contact." The premium service allows any of 10 trusted contacts to set notifications into motion and will send messages to 50 friends. SlightlyMorbid isn't all about death, though. (In fact, there are plans to change the name to DesignatedContact.com.) Users can set up messages to be sent in the case of accident, absence, or disaster—say, having to scat for a hurricane but wanting to let everyone quickly know you're OK. The service sets itself up like getting a will written. It charges a one-time fee that allows changes to friends and trusted contacts lists for three years. After that, changes cost another one-time fee. The fees range from $9 for a basic account to $50 for the premium account.

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When my mother became sick and eventually died it took years to clean up the mess. From my experience I can tell you that all of these products fall short of offering a comprehensive solution to arranging your final affairs. Estate++ offers more features, more upload storage space, for much less money.

James Bell of NC 5:09PM October 13, 2009

Forty years ago, long before we used the Internet for everything, a magazine article suggested that readers write a letter to their spouse, to be opened in the event of the reader's death. In the letter readers were encouraged to list the location of life insurance policies, wills, deeds, etc. We were also reminded that this could be a love letter, a "see-you-on-the-other-side" letter, could contain a home movie (after all, this was 40 hears ago), an audio recording, and/or anything else we wished. The letter and other contents should be sealed in a suitable envelope, we were told, clearly labeled, and put in a safe spot in the home, with a note in the reader's wallet and as copy of the note in the spouse's purse stating the location of the letter.

It was low tech, free, easily updated, and not subject to cyber thieves or the possibility of a Web repository going out of business.

I wrote mine in 1969. On a typewriter. Virtually everything in it has been updated (including the name of my spouse, after my divorce and remarriage), but I still have the original, just for the memories.

Neither that letter, not a data-keeping Web site, takes the place of a will, of course. But it seems that letter provides all of the basic services offered by the high-tech Web sites.

I suppose the letter could be lost in a fire or flood. Maybe I should keep a copy at my office, too.

Tom of CA 5:19PM September 21, 2009

After my husband found he had lung cancer we started to prepair for his passing. Although we felt we had everything in place I found that the one thing we had not thought of was his computer accounts. Just before he passesed he handed me a scrunched up paper that had accounts and passwords on it. The only problem was nothing matched. It took me over a year to get all his accounts closed. I thought I was done. Wrong. Almost 2 years after his death I started receiving overdue bills for accounts I had no idea he had. It was a nightmair. Now that I'm a widow with no children or family I turned to Legacy Locker to help me set up an account so that my accounts can be handled by a person I feel comfortable with leaving my lifes legacy to.

EllenMae Serviss of AZ 5:40PM September 18, 2009

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