How to Avoid Money Envy

Book author explains how to put a stop to ‘keeping up with the Joneses.’

August 1, 2011 RSS Feed Print
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You talk about controlling reactions to situations that could provoke envy. For example, telling yourself that it doesn't matter if your neighbors are going on a fancy vacation that you can't afford. Does that really work?

It works! I learned this trick from a marathon training program designed by a psychologist: Whenever you feel discomfort, remind yourself, "But it doesn't matter." Sometimes simple things seem too simple to work, but I encourage you to give it a try. I've heard from readers who have been amazed that this makes a difference in their level of comfort. Another technique is to note that we usually compare ourselves with those who are above us, but not below. While you strive to get to the next level, also frequently stop and realize how far you've come and how good you have it, and be thankful.

[See 10 Baby Products You Should Never Buy.]

Obviously, a lot of us are tempted to buy more than we can afford. Do you have any advice for controlling those temptations and sticking with a budget?

There's nothing wrong with indulging ourselves, even materialistically. What's important is that we go back to an old-fashioned technique that works wonders: Save money first, then spend. We've gotten used to getting what we want now, without being able to afford it. Then we end up paying a lot extra in interest, plus anxiety about our debts. Squirrel a little cash aside from every paycheck to buy the things you want. Then realize how much more fun it is to buy something when you can truly afford it.

Twitter: @alphaconsumer

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Mark of NY 1:38AM August 06, 2011

It is very true what you say about money envy. I was that way. Making $37k and spending $50k. Until....I met my wife. She changed my outlook on money and life. In three years we have paid off $36k in consumer debt (credit cards) and $32K in student loans. Plus have a very nice savings and 401(k). I stepped out on faith and took a new job making a lot more money.

It is a GREAT feeling to have no debt, except out home. And the most remarkable thing is......even though I could go out and buy pretty much any new "gadget" I want, I really just don't want it.

T Sartain of VA 12:16PM August 03, 2011

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