Top 10 Places for Swinging Single Seniors to Retire

You’re never too old to fall in love—or fall apart

February 20, 2009 RSS Feed Print

It's not too late to fall in love again during your retirement years. In fact, now that the child-rearing years are largely behind you, it's the perfect time to find someone you truly enjoy spending time with. “You've completed your adult tasks, which are to raise a family and establish yourself in the community,” says Abigail Trafford, author of As Time Goes By: Boomerang Marriages, Serial Spouses, Throwback Couples, and Other Romantic Adventures in an Age of Longevity. “Once you're in your 50s and 60s, you put a premium not on scoring with someone, but on connecting with someone and being who you really are.”

If you're looking for a new relationship or at least a crush in retirement, you're in good company. Approximately 46 percent of Americans age 65 and older are currently single, including people who are widowed, divorced, separated, and never married, according to the Census Bureau. To help you connect with other single seniors, U.S. News consulted Brookings Institution demographer William Frey, who determined the U.S. cities with the most single people over age 65. We slimmed down that list with our Best Places to Retire search tool to single out retirement havens with plenty of opportunities to meet other singles and fun things to do on a date.

There's a bit of serendipity involved in finding a new love connection, but you can stack the odds in your favor. “A new interest will bring new people into your life,” says John Gray, a certified family therapist and author of Mars and Venus Starting Over: A Practical Guide for Finding Love Again After a Painful Breakup, Divorce, or the Loss of a Loved One. For example, you might sign up for southwestern cooking lessons or a painting class in one of the country's artistic capitals, Sante Fe, N.M. Or join a gardening workshop or horticultural society at the Memphis Botanic Garden. Many senior centers provide more than just bingo tournaments and affordable lunches. The Milford Connecticut Senior Center, for example, offers dance and exercise lessons, Tai Chi, conversational Spanish, French, and Italian classes, and computer skills workshops.

Gray recommends taking on projects and activities that encourage interaction in order to achieve a common goal. “Try some activity that you are not very good at and ask for help,” advises Gray. “Men bond with women more easily when they are doing something to help the woman.” Asking for or offering assistance playing poker, blackjack, or keno in Reno, Nev., is sure to make both of your pulses race. Afterward, you can relax at a concert, golden oldie review, or comedy show.

Retiring to a college town such as Providence, R.I., or Columbus, Ga., gives you plenty of opportunities to seek help with your homework or to discuss the week's reading over coffee. An added perk: college tuition is often discounted for seniors. For example, Towson University in Maryland offers a tuition waiver program for state residents age 60 and older who don't work full time. These retirees also get free access to the library and recreational facilities, as well as discounts to campus events.

Another great way to meet other singles is to ask your friends to make an introduction. Savor a glass of wine with a friend in Santa Rosa, Calif., situated in an area that boasts more than 200 wineries with tasting rooms, and ask if they know anyone who might be right for you. You might also take a bottle to go and hike the local redwood forests, observe the stars at the Santa Rosa Junior College Planetarium, or share a giggle over a Peanuts comic strip at the Charles M. Schulz museum.

Romance can also flourish in waterfront towns like Boston suburb Quincy, Mass., which has 27 miles of coastline. For an interlude that's more adventurous than an amorous walk in the surf, try your hand at scuba diving along the coral reef system in Fort Lauderdale, Fla. You can even explore a sunken ship as you traverse the multicolored aquatic wildlife.

Tags:
relationships,
retirement

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Perhaps senior singles will have to create their own cities. I love the beach and mountains so perhaps central California; not too hot or cold; nice variety of scenery; more educated, refined people. AZ is swingin with hot seniors; however I could not stand the 100+ AZ weather; ditto with Orlando; the beach towns in FL are much cooler and less muggy/buggy than the FL interior. However, not the Villages community that is overcrowed and overdeveloped ard full of old grumps and ingroups of boring and offensive old jocks just like high school all over again. So, perhaps NC or Texas. I love nature and birds. So perhaps joining a bird watching group and following the birds from north to south and back. Anything positive that single older people like to do.

Merl of MD 10:45PM October 30, 2011

I relocated from Seattle to San Diego about 10 years to be closer to my aging parents. By all outside factors it seemed to be ideal option, but as I look back I realize I've never felt so empty as I have in these past years. Lack of intellectual curiosity ..wow! I'm a people person, single, mid 50's and not bad looking. But how do you meet real people here? If I don't want to get skin cancer by hanging out at the beach? All I can recall about Seattle is maybe because it did have different weather, people gathered together indoors and spent more time sharing themselves conversationally. Is that why facebook has rocketed?? Does anybody really care?

Gypsi Eyes of CA 1:19PM February 11, 2011

What is so very, very wrong about this advice?

“Try some activity that you are not very good at and ask for help,” advises Gray. “Men bond with women more easily when they are doing something to help the woman.”

In other words, "Women, play dumb...let the Big Man be the Big Man?"

I certainly do hope that other women are more self-respecting than to think that this idea will attract a relationship that will make them happy!

John Grey is a victim of the 50s....and not an intelligent one....

san jose of CA 11:48PM October 20, 2009

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